Garanimals Blog

October 1st, 2012 at 5:00 am

Kissing the Mommy Guilt Goodbye

I know I feel some sort of guilt almost 100% of the time. How about you?

Do you ever think….

  • I’m having way more fun on this night away from the kids……I must be a bad mom.
  • My house isn’t as clean as it could be….. I must be a bad stay -at-home mom.
  • My child isn’t walking, reading, crawling, smiling….. it starts at birth, actually even in utero.
  • I work too much……I am a bad working mom.

Why don’t I enjoy every moment of this?….I must be an awful mom guilt.

And the list goes on. Mom Guilt plagues us all – over and over, again and again. It can even consume you and you can start giving it to others. Ever hear some of these things……..

  • What is your son doing when you are on the computer?
  • We read 20 books a day to our daughter, how many do you read?
  • Oh, you don’t use cloth diapers? or Why do you use cloth diapers?
  • Oh, you formula feed? or You’re still breast feeding?
  • You go out an awful lot?
  • I stay home with my child, you don’t? or Aren’t you worried your child is losing out out because he isn’t in daycare/school?
  • My son is walking already, yours isn’t?
  • We’ve been doing mommy and me activities since he was a baby.

A lot of the time we don’t even realize that we are inferring that another mom may not be raising their baby in the best way possible. Many of these times we are making that other mom feel guilty.The best part is that we hold the power to combat it ourselves. Guilt isn’t a productive emotion…..nothing good comes from it. I find that it never completely goes away, but I can find ways to lessen it. I try to remember these things….

  • I’m not perfect.
  • I make the best decisions I can for myself and my family.
  • Life happens.
  • Sometimes it is about making it through the day.
  • For every bad thing that you think I do, I could find one you do. (But I try to be better than that)

Every mom does their best.Before I had kids, did I ever think that sometimes I would let my kids have ice cream for breakfast? Definitely not. Life happens and sometimes ice cream happens. I’m not a perfect mom, actually far from it, but my kids are good kids who are happy. That, in the end, is what defines to me if I am a good mom. That’s how I combat Mommy Guilt.

Or maybe not,  since I am now feeling guilty that I told you the ice cream secret. 

How do you combat your Mommy Guilt?

 

Kim Ross also writes at  A Little Bit of This and That ~ The Adventures of a Stay at Home Mom.

 

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